just so you know

guilty

my mum says that i know what to do and that i am able to do it. but i never do it.

i know i am lazy. but all i do is just say that i am lazy. you realise you can correct your behavior but you don't take any action. so what's the use of knowing that i am lazy, myself ? is it better to not realise my laziness, or realise it, without any action? it's not enough to know it sometimes. you have to do something about it. action speaks louder than words. and i really need to change. before i regret like mad.

i have been quite an ungrateful son. not appreciative enough of my parents. their really the best. my dad does not scold me for going out like everyday, coming home late, and for not having a job. and he always tries to be friendly and talk to me at night but i sometimes buzz him off for being irritating. he's very nice. making time to watch a movie with me on some weeknights when he still has some work to do. my mum also doesn't nag me as much as before.
and all the while i know that i should be more appreciative.

i haven't been good enough, though i could be if i wanted to. i need to study much harder next time.

the question now is
will i ever be good enough for my parents?



i won't sit around, i can't let him win now